Oblivion

I’ve been drifting

I’ve been drifting on these oceans

from wave to wave

wondering when will I find the shore.

When will I find the island filled with promises of untold happiness,

inner peace and fulfillment?

I’ve been in here for far too long,

I tried leaving this raft that kept me from falling in

but all I end up doing is floating on what can be, yet won’t.

I’ve been aimlessly swimming and ended back where I started due to the fear of the unknown.

What am I doing?

I’ve been here for so long

I have started to believe that this is where I truly belong.

An vast plane of water, too shallow for me to drown,

moving aimlessly back and forth.

I used to get so excited when a wave come by,

yet without a sail to capture the wind I cannot move in a steady direction.

I have no map to guide me and no compass to set a course.

All I have is hope based on rumors from people

who are in the same ocean,

with a similar raft

no sails

no campus

And no map.

Enathi Mbanga