Mania

A break from the norm is what I needed the most in these situations. I felt pressure from all sides as I thought about my life in general...

When thinking about what I have accomplished so far I feel like I have not reached the highest of heights than where I am now. nothing seems to challenge my current self besides my thoughts. They bash and slash me down to the finest and most thinnest form of depression...

you... gave me the need of rebirth

you changed that. I was blinded by my own sadness to see you have been crawling and consuming my very being from the outside in. working, pushing and pulling at my elastic heart. Tearing it and patching it with pieces of yourself...

my lips quiver as sounds of hatred were begging to be freed but your very smile made it evaporate into vapors right before my eyes. Punching sense into to me to keep going, to go out by myself and challenge the world. to prove to myself that I am a worthy opponent...

but...as per usual

You were nothing but a stepping stone in my life and I had to let you go. You were a free spirit after all and your purpose was fulfilled. I will not lie and pretend as if I felt like i was used for your own temporary release of euphoria...

I was warned by you, for your purpose in my life was only a temporary fix that would push me to my limits. I'm sorry that i forgot my place. Look at me, making you seem like a drug that I was addicted to. Each encounter with you left me on a all time high. Making me feel invincible to the world...

my arms spread like an angel and taking on the torrential winds of life. I know that you know the feeling. You embodied it. You are...IT. I wanted to go as far as calling you the very soul mate that God gifted to me. But you refused to be a possession. You never were mine, because you were meant for a higher purpose.

YOUR SO CALLED LOVE! It was not for me alone... am I right?!

It pains me to this day to see you. Smiling widely with the new belle under your arms. You are beautiful together. Even though we used to do the same thing. I still have the captured memories preserved in my galleria of antiquities, they taking up space anyway. I should get rid of them. From the messages to the gifts to the ties that accumulated overtime.

Its shameful to keep looking back into the past and let me be the first to admit. Yes, i did lose myself a few times during the process, but you taught me well master. Pain is nothing but a futile emotion for the weak. A healer and a killer. A perfect cliffhanger to the ending.

to feel like a ghost, forgotten and abandoned, cursed to be wander like a lost soul in the deepest darkest tunnels of your mind. It was precise. You made sure. I thank you for making it a clean cut. I know my place very well now...

Sure I was in denial for the few seconds... minutes... hours... days... weeks... months... you get it. I was pretty down(putting it mildly), but I never spiraled and lost my self again. I got up everyday afterwards and followed my normal routine while cutting you out of the equation.

I am fine now and sincerely fuck you.

_PasopNegra_